A while ago, I was carrying laundry, in a rush to the basement at about 6 a.m. and missed the second to the bottom step. You can probably imagine what happened next. I came tumbling down, dispersing dirty clothing everywhere. I landed on the top of my foot rather than the sole. Needless to say, I dislocated the ankle and fractured it in two places.
I remember Googling 'fractured ankle', trying to learn how long it would take to heal. The amount of weeks I saw that it would take was awe-inspiring. During that time I spent time in a wheel chair, on crutches, in a motorized cart while shopping and in a boot. I also had surgery, which was scary. For a former dancer and someone who loves yoga, this was a humbling experience.
As you know from reading this blog, I have been going to restorative yoga for healing my body and getting more in touch with it. One class I go to is strictly restorative in the best sense of the word. The other one calls itself restorative but includes standing poses, moderate abdominal exercises and balancing poses such as tree pose.
At first I was pretty pissed off that the teacher was not strictly restorative as advertised. I do believe in fate and suspected that there is a reason I was drawn to her class. After the many months that had elapsed since my ankle fracture, I still didn't have the bravery to stand on that foot alone without the support of my other leg. Tree pose forced me to do this. To accomplish what seemed like a great feat to me, I had to ground, center and focus. In some ways I came out of my body and got more in touch with spirit. Doing that pose, the last time I was in the "restorative yoga" class, was more healing than stretching or resting on bolsters. It renewed my faith in my self and the abilities of my mind and body.
There is something to be said for standing firmly on your own two feet or just one leg, and through it all, holding your space.