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Saying No to Being a Yes Woman

Oh, how I loved the movie "Yes Man." Jim Carey is always hilarious as it is, and he was especially funny as "Yes Man." He decided not to really decide about things but to see where fate took him by saying "yes" and agreeing to everything put before him, in that film.

"Y" is quite a beautiful letter when you examine it closely and if you have good penmanship. It seems like the start of great things. I can think of many words to write about that start with Y but chose to write about being a Yes Woman.

I am reasonably well educated, and know the different between the words no and yes, even if I wasn't. The trouble is, when I mean and hear "no" in my head, knowing the particular thing is not right for me, the word yes comes flying out of my mouth.

This conundrum has come quite keenly to the fore in two arenas, with solicitors and in my job hunt. I know I can't afford to give my money away, however good the cause is but often end up agreeing, with a simple "yes," when in reality the answer should be:

This word confusion even came to play this morning. I had a phone interview last week, and the information I was being told about the potential job was not at all a good fit for me and yet, I agreed to the in-person interview. The interview should be going on right now. I knew full well that to take this job, if it was offered, would mean the end of my writing and art careers, at least for as long as I held the job. It was a huge commitment in body, mind and spirit, to working over a period of 6 days and 40 or more hours per week.

So, as the A to Z April Blogger's Challenge draws to a close, I am thinking ever more carefully about my word choices since I have been blogging so much. To this point in my life I have been considered a Yes Woman, going against my own grain in the process more often than not. I realize and will put into action in my life that yes means yes but yes does not mean no.

"Y" is for Yes Woman
A to Z Blogger's Challenge


  1. This is something many of us go through. I need to learn the art of saying NO wo explaining myself. Nice to read your perspective, Stephanie:)

    1. Vishal, thank you so much for stopping by again. I have followed your blog so I can stay abreast of what you are writing about because it is always so interesting to read your perspective. Yes, there is indeed an art to saying No but we will get there some day soon, I'm sure of it!

  2. I used to practice saying "No" in the mirror: "'No' is a viable answer. No is as viable as 'Yes.' If I can't say 'No,' no one will trust me, no one will know me; they will always have to say what they think I wand to hear." Now, I'm much better at saying know and hearing it too. But occasionally, I do get caught.

    Good luck fighting your natural "Yes" response.

    Visiting from A to Z Challenge, Drusilla

    1. Drusilla, I love the idea of practicing what you will say, for example the word, "no" in the mirror. What a compelling practice. It hurts at first not to be able to agree to everything but then after the initial sting goes away you feel lighter and more sincere, so I agree with you there.

  3. It takes a long time to learn to say NO :) I am glad you covered this topic. I sure needed to learn and practice this word.

    1. Thanks Cecilia! I'm glad the post spoke to you.

  4. "Yes" was both of our "Y" words for the blogging challenge so I was intrigued..I would have enjoyed the post anyway, but particularly did so for that reason. You make an interesting point - knowing the difference between "yes" and "no" but still speaking the wrong one...nice post! Oh yes, I'm from

  5. I do love your blog and have subscribed to it to keep in touch with what you are working on. I really appreciate your stopping by to read my Y post, and the fact that despite our picking the same word, you still got something out of my blogging. I loved your Yes piece as well about the beauty of saying yes to life despite being very ill and reflection on letting your inner beauty shine!

  6. Thanks so much Stephanie! It takes practice to say 'no' and mean it - eg children know that 'no' is meant. Otherwise 'no' becomes so much white noise; people know that you can have your arm twisted if no means maybe or yes.
    Hopping over to your Y post now - it looks wonderful!
    Garden of Eden Blog

  7. So sorry, I meant X - which is indeed wonderful!

  8. Thanks Susan. I like how you put it, "white noise." Saying no to the arm twisting, as well. I enjoyed your post very much today. Still working on my blessed "Z" post.

  9. Oh, I get it now Susan. Thanks for reading and commenting on my X post. I always enjoy hearing from you!


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