Wednesday, November 26, 2014

Stepping Closer to Winter of Mind and Spirit

Fall has hammered me. I believe I have SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder). This type of disruption happens every year. Lessening of outdoor light, naked trees, leaves blowing about--BINGO, my spirits fall. Most days, I'm flat lining.

I know there are full spectrum lights available. Must get one of those. Meanwhile, I've been trying flower essences, essential oils, meditation, naps, whatever...still SAD takes over, thus less and less blog posts, writing and other creative production.

This empty basket represents the harvest. SAD isn't just about the weather and light changes for me, it's about the harvest. I have posted quite happily about sowing seeds, putting good energy out into the world. But what I'm noticing is how many things I've put into that harvest basket and then tossed back out and into the universe. That makes me sad too.
My debut novel, so to speak, was to be published spring 2015. No go. Too many problems and issues to move forward on that one for a plethora of reasons I don't care to go into today. So, as of now, no debut novel.

My spirituality and weight loss book? Let's see. It's had two small presses interested in signing it. I pulled it from both for complex reasons. What I tell myself is that I was looking out for the best interest of the book. That book was also to come out in the spring of 2015. It does have a new literary agency representing it. I am ever so hopeful Nikki will enable the book to land in a really good, prominent and appropriate publishing house. Time will tell and when it does I'll share it with you here.

My career in freelancing rose quickly on Elance and just as quickly has dried up. I ran into a wide variety of problems and to be honest, schemes, with that website's clientele. Not my cuppa. So I closed out my membership, after working through various difficulties and spending over a thousand dollars, I didn't have. Ugh! Frustrating. Fellow freelance writers beware of that site. Proceed with caution, read everything you can about it before partaking. That's all I have to say about it.

Yes, I still have a lot to be thankful for. But I'm SAD and sad, and feeling drained of my life energy so preparing for Thanksgiving is presenting some challenges. The good things apart from my beautiful family and lovely pets that I'm thankful for are rediscovering art. I blog and talk about art making but haven't done diddly squat until recently.

In my studio today, I have three very large paintings going between 3' and 6'--so there, that's something. They are explorations of the self--self portraits, blown up bits of pieces (eyes, teeth, nostrils) examined piece by piece, little by little. Those should keep me busy for a while. I shall share some of the images soon on this blog. I've returned to oil on canvas and am doing smaller mixed media studies on paper. Painting in oil is wonderful! It's luxurious and expansive in its possibilities. It gives me hope, even as I step into the winter of mind and spirit, which may be even a darker stage than fall.

Wednesday, November 5, 2014

With Gratitude

Not sure if it's luck, hard work, lots of wishing or a combination of all three but it is with sincere gratitude that I report in, this first Wednesday of November for the IWSG (Insecure Writer's Support Group) monthly blog post.

I could look at my situation negatively because much of what I've been going on about here in this space has turned out to be...

but everything happens for a reason. I've decided to return to the pure source of my inspiration. This requires me to simply write as much as I can and to paint with a open heart in my studio. 

All this is easier said than done. I had gotten extremely distracted and pulled away from creative writing and painting by various projects and part-time jobs. I was over-scheduled and distracted. Distracted to the point where I couldn't breathe, let alone be creative. It all left me drained of creativity and my body revolted. I am a bit under the weather, thus I haven't been posting much or visiting other blogs. Today though, I want to share some good news, in light of being a IWSG member.

My spirituality and weight loss book called "Mama Nature's Spiritual Guide to Weight Loss" has been through so much. Much of it was shared here. In the end none of it was right for me or for the book. I waited and low and behold, something wonderful has happened. I'm so happy to say I'll be working with the literary agent, Nikki Terpilowski.  Nikki is now representing that book and eventually my other books, through Holloway Literary Agency.

In short, I want to express gratitude to Nikki for believing in my talent. Her acceptance of my work came during a time I was beginning to doubt it.  I'd also become confused about my direction. I am so happy the universe acted within the open space available, enabling Nikki and I to work together at this particularly sensitive time in my creative life.

To my fellow IWSG members I want to share my new found appreciation for space. Open space, re-opened the door to creativity in its purest form. Open space was found during down time. That space was opened further by illness, of all things. Slowing down, as is necessary for healing, led to revising the direction of my life. 

Writer friends and visitors, I urge you to always make space for what it is you love. Through the space you leave open, all things are possible.